2018 Samhain Blog Hop – Saying thanks to Spirit

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Spirits have always been part of my life. I would probably feel very lonely without my clairesentience ability… and thinking about this makes me realise that sometimes I am an absolute twat with *them*. An ungrateful opportunistic selfish little human being who even forgets to do her prayers in the morning. (Well it’s mostly due to my toddler needing something and me getting side tracked but still.) What’s due is due and the question prompts kindly provided by our wrangler Aisling come very timely indeed. 

To take a look at my relationship with one spirit who is very dear to me, I have used the Darkwater Tarot by James Douglas. This is my new go-to deck when it comes to communication with the other side. Its black and white images lend themselves well to this task; they remind me of what is beyond the veil, and after testing them in a number of readings for different topics they became my 78 piece Ouija board. 

So let us see the spread I have created for this wonderful occasion! (I am not good at staying with what has been provided, sorry)


James Douglas Darkwater Tarot1. (The selfish little human): what does my spirit guide (slash secret crush) think about me?
2: What do I think of my spirit guide (slash secret crush)?
3: What is the thing I’m doing he is happy with?
4: What is the thing I’m doing he is fed up with?
5:  What is the thing he’s doing that I am happy with?
6: Why?
7: What is the thing he’s doing I am fed up with?
8: Why?
9: What is the main thing he wants to teach me right now?
10: How can I ever thank him for being such an awesome dude?
Well, looking at the cards, I am surprised there are not many Majors… Not quite what I expected – or rather – not what I wanted to see.
1. (The selfish little human): what does my spirit guide (slash secret crush) think about me? – Three of Pentacles
Am I so hard to work with? Really? Surely not! What do you mean I’m whining all the time?!
2: What do I think of my spirit guide (slash secret crush)? The Star reversed/ Empty Sky
I think He isn’t fulfilling my wishes, and I do know it is a good thing, ok? I might moan about stuff time to time but who doesn’t? (Now he rolls his eyes at me and tells me a name who doesn’t. Le sigh.) The sky would indeed be empty without him. There was a period when I had to be without him, and it was hard. I am super happy he is back.
3: What is the thing I’m doing he is happy with? – King of Cups reversed
I am controlling my emotions much better than I used to. And working on leaving behind what doesn’t serve my emotional wellbeing. Yay.
4: What is the thing I’m doing he is fed up with? – Two of Wands reversed
I am not acting on my ideas. I am fed up with it too. Sorry dude… 😦 I’m working on it!
5:  What is the thing he’s doing that I am happy with? – 10 of Cups reversed
He isn’t going light on me anymore. There was a time when he was super kind and just kept me floating, giving me strength to survive. Now I can take on more, so he does dump it on me and I love him for it.
6: Why? – Page of Wands
Because I am ready!! (Said it in Spongebob style.) I am proud of being stronger.
7: What is the thing he’s doing I am fed up with? – 4 of Cups
Amm… I have no idea what this means. At all. Nope. There’s nothing I am fed up with. Lol.
8: Why? – Lovers reversed/The Fall
Oh all right sometimes I do miss him being super nice. Jeez, this deck is insistent.
9: What is the main thing he wants to teach me right now? – The World reversed/ The Unexplained
Omg wow! Oh-kay…. no pressure then… I shall grab my notebook! ^_^
10: How can I ever thank him for being such an awesome dude? – 10 of Wands reversed
Stop whining and taking too much on. Enjoy life, spend time with family. Also, the ten wands look like ten skewers ready to grill some food for him. I wonder if he’s hinting at something, haha! (Yes. Yes he is.)
Well, this spread did turn out nicer than I expected it to be! If you give it a go, do let me know how it went! Or you could hop on to Jay or Arwen’s posts! Happy Halloween!

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Kati’s Tarot Sadow Challenge Day 3 – The High Priestess

Day three, The High Priestess – nursery, primary school teachers, female family members (like sister or nieces) apart from your mother and grandmothers. The first time we come in contact with women other than our mother (who ideally was the epitome of love this time) can be hard. They might act differently than we are used to with ‘mom’, and that can lead to confusion, disappointment or fear. If a teacher gives you punishment for something your mom would just smile on, it leaves a big scar. This is the first step to realize not everyone loves you unconditionally. Ask your cards: How did these women affect my Shadow? What part of me did they put there?
tarot, shadow, work, high priestess,

The Master of the Cup – How did these women affect my Shadow?

Through my sister I had to learn that I am not the centre of the universe – at least of my mother’s universe – and that sharing can be good, although I was not very happy to share my mother’s love and attention. I am the oldest child so for some time I have got all the attention and naturally it is hard to give that up. 
Through my teachers I had to learn to shut up, sit down and “drink my milk” even if it’s too hot -see how the cup has a cloud of steam rising from it… by this I mean obedience and listening, even if I know it is not exactly right. I was never brave enough to stand up for myself.

2. The Sphynx, The Mistress of the Cup and The Three Swords – What part of me did they put there?

Accepting that things change all the time is hard, and I guess I am afraid of change after all. I never though I was, but thinking about it now yes, I am uncomfortable with change.

The part of me that could say “no, I’d like to have this ice-coffee, thank you very much all the same!” The one that is not jumping to other’s tunes.

The fighting back part.

Kati’s Tarot Shadow Challenge Day 2 – The Magician

Day two, The Magician – Childhood and teens. Today’s card looks at your self esteem, confidence and actions that have affected your Shadow during your childhood and teens. Ask your cards: How did my childhood and puberty affect my shadow? How did my self confidence evolve? What are the things that has become part of my Shadow this time?

My cards are: The Magician (hahaha) The Four of Swords, The Ace of Cups, the Five of Wands and the Hermit.
Root card: Death.

1. The Magi – How did my childhood and puberty affect my shadow?

The Magus/Magician is so full of self-confidence he is likely to burst. Exactly the opposit of my childhood self. I was shy, brainy, a bookworm; I quickly had to learn that studying too much will only get you bullied. I have soon stopped being openly brainy… a nice manifestation of the Magi’s deceptive, illusionist side. Based on this I’d say I have issues with showing off my knowledge and with my confidence in general.

2. The Four Swords – How did my self confidence evolve? 
I think we have explored this, hahaha! Actually I loved to perform. Competitions, school events, drama group… the only problem was that I always got soooo nervous that I couldn’t perform to the quality I would have liked. Till date if I have to defend my point of view I get nervous and forget everything I otherwise know by heart. 😀 So yeah… always second place.

3. The Cup, The Five Scepters and the Veiled Lamp – What are the things that have become part of my Shadow this time?
Intuition/spirituality, trust in myself and my abilities, the ability to teach others or share my knowledge.