Journey into Crowley’s Death

Crowley's Death from Thoth TarotThis is one of Crowley’s strangest cards. Unlike in the RWS or Marseille decks, here the skeleton turns his back towards us, and he wears the crown of Osiris, the Egyptian god of Death and Afterlife. He is surrounded by the creatures associated with the Zodiac of Scorpio, and instead of reaping  body-parts he is popping the bubbles of peoples’ lives with his scythe. It almost looks fun. Almost…

But what is really interesting about him, is the way he is holding his scythe. This is not how a farmer would reap his crops. This is not how it is supposed to be held. I have tried to read up on it, but I couldn’t really find anything. Of course, thousands of articles have been written on the Thoth, so maybe I just haven’t clicked on the right ones. Be as it may, I wanted to find out about this. I have journeyed.

 

I close my eyes…

Take a deep breath…
Three…
Two…

One…

I am sitting on a hilltop. The wind blows lightly, but I can feel it is much stronger near the gigantic black skeleton some distance away. I can hear a constant murmur, like I am under water in the ocean, listening to currents moving above. There is another, eerie sound; just at the border of hearing, something similar to the screeching a stopping train’s wheels make. It comes from the scythe as it separates those souls from their bodies. It sends shivers down my spine.
The Hanged Man and Death from Crowley's Thoth Tarot
I look to my left and get a jump. A pair of upside down… khmm… body-parts hang just next to me! I remind myself where I am. This is the previous card, the one every querent wants to turn around at first. I look down, searching for his face but I find the features of a bird; or perhaps a robot.

 

“He looks majestic, doesn’t he?” The Hanged Man asks.

“Yes. He does.”

“I can’t wait to reach him at last! It will be such a relief.”

“Why are you hanging like this? And what happened to your face?”

“I have given up my attachments, only the holy Ankh, container of all Life Force keeps me pinned here now. While hanging here I have realized the difference between this body and me. The real me that is my soul. I am free from ego and so I don’t have a face.”

“Will He turn around or do you have to go there?”

“Let’s get closer, shall we?”
He floats towards the skeleton and I follow him.
“Why is he holding his scythe in such a strange way?” I ask.

“He is not reaping, he is not taking. He is not violent. He is offering his scythe to those who are ready to pass below it. He is kneeling down and makes this ultimate offering of kindness and mercy.”

“The mercy of death?”

“The mercy of release. Of change. Of evolution and progress. Yes. The Mercy of Death.”

 

Suddenly he is not there anymore. I am standing in front of the skeleton. He is even taller than I first thought. He looks down at me and gently shakes his head, then shoos me away with his hand. I understand. He lets me watch, but it is not my time yet.

 
I turn around and see an ocean of souls. I feel scared. I am terrified of ghosts. They swarm around me and I want to scream, but suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder. Then on the other side. My grandfather and grandmother are standing behind me. They are giving me courage to see all those souls for what they really are: people, just like me.

 
I see them part and let a group of spirits through. I recognize my wife from a previous life. I hug her tight and she hugs back, and I am so thankful she is here! Then I feel a tug on my suit (when did I change from my night dress?) and my children are there, waiting for their turn. I am so happy and relieved; I was a horrible father and husband, I thought they hated me. But they smile and I know they have forgiven, if they were ever angry at all. I call them by their names and realize I know everything I thought to have forgotten about them. The eldest is wise beyond her years; the boy is a sweetheart; the youngest is a cheeky little girl… They hug me once more and I know it is time for them to go. They slowly dissolve into the sea of souls and I stand there in my nightdress, grateful and uplifted.

“So this is your mercy?” I ask Death. “You offer it to those who are ready for it.”

He doesn’t speak but I hear his voice in my head.

“This was not for you. This was mercy for them. To see that man you used to be without the hatred that tainted his memory. They are now released. Your turn will come too.”
I wake up, back in my room, emotional and a little sad. I decide that This card is going to be my safe place.

 

 

Have you journeyed into or meditated on this card? I would love to hear about your experience!

Relationship heath checkup

Staying up with a teething baby who caught a cold can make you become many things, from a psychopath to the epitome of motherly love. The choice, as always, is yours. I chose to sit with baby on the sofa and write a long awaited new post.

Baby’s situation has made me think of my health and how important it is to keep it. Then about the health of relationships in general. It is so easy to overlook the little telltale signs of deterioration! The following spread can be used as a tool for pointing out possible problems and heal them before it’s too late.

The relationship health check spread


1: What do I need to know about my relationship with Xy right now?

2: What is it that we are doing well and should continue doing?

3: What should we change to improve our relationship?

4: What do I need to change in myself to improve our relationship?

5: What do I expect the other person to change in themself?

6: What do I have to know about this expectation?

7: Outcome if we follow the card’s advice.

Let’s see this reading done for my son (4) and myself!
1. 2 of Pentacles. We have a balanced relationship right now. I feel I need to keep a balance between the boys, tarot and household, and looking at this card, I think I am managing well.
2. Wheel of Fortune. We are adapting to changes well. At this age, my son goes through a lot of changes in every aspect of life. We are keeping up and don’t stop learning and playing.
3. Page of Wands. The thing we have to change is the will to control each other. Shouting. Also, we need to bring curiosity and learning, and a little more adventure. Well, his little brother is growing up too (10 months), so now we can do a lot more things together. They love to play with each other, so there you go!
4. 8 of Cups. I need to say bye to things that aren’t working anymore. To the cute little toddler he was, who did anything I said and never said no. To writing my novel and to attending workshops and courses. I will come back to them when the kids are older. But right now I have to step back and do what is really important.
5: 2 of Swords. I want him to do what I say when I say it. This of course bumps into a revolt, and ultimately ends up with me shouting and Son crying or seething in a corner, throwing stuff on the floor. I want him to stop this and do what he is told to immediately.
6: Queen of Wands. With proper discipline and a different approach it could probably work, but the way I do it is hopeless. Well. Time to stop the screaming then. Note that the thing we have to change is the Page of Wands. Yepp, until I don’t cange that, this part will not work out as I want it to. Also, I think we need less fire energy. 
7: King of Cups. A loving, caring relationship where we can listen to each other and cooperate, and not dominate the other. That will be awesome! Pulling some more cards right now and making a plan how to achieve it!
If you would like your reading done with this spread, write me on katalin.patnaik(at)gmail.com for a quick quote!
Thank you for reading, have a beautiful day!

June 2016 Tarot Blog Hop – Junkmail tarot

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For the June Tarot Blog hop our wrangler, Morgan Drake Eckstein asked us to make DIY tarot cards out of junk mail. What a wonderful, creative and challenging idea! Not to mention that it will finally give a purpose to all that rubbish that’s landing in our mailboxes every day. In the time of the year when people usually do their great clear-out both physically and mentally, it couldn’t be more apt than this.

After many accidentally thrown leaflets I have rescued some, and made the cards before anything else could happen to them! May I proudly present you:

The Five of Pentacles made of a Vote Leave leaflet. You know, Britain will soon vote whether it should remain in the EU or leave? Well, this leave leaflet failed to impress.😛

The card was so much fun to make though that I’m thinking to do a whole deck! Preferably a borderless one as I just don’t have the patience (and free time) to paspartou them.

The card was of course inspired by RWS decks, but simplified into this universally understood gesture of turning out one’s empty pocket as a sign of poverty.

The Seven of Pentacles, here the 6.99 of Pentacles shows a woman dressed in salad and harvesting apples in the world of junk food. Made of junk-food-mail.🙂

I really wish I could do more of these, but to my surprise, we really don’t receive as many advertisements as I thought we do – and I ran out of glue. (Thanks to son who thought to collect stones with the glue-stick…)

So, this is it for now, run along and check out the other wonderful creations people have made! Happy solstice and de-cluttering  everyone!

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Zaklató kártyák – Carla Tate vendégírása

(A következő cikk Carla Tate munkája, amit az írónő engedélyével fordítottam le és jelentettem meg. Az eredeti poszt itt található.)

 

“Lámcsak, ki van itt megint. A Botok Hatos követ engem, ezért ma reggel felhasználom Pearl Annie zaklató kártya technikáját.

 

Megkevertem a kártyáimat és elosztottam őket öt részre: Tűz, Víz, Föld, Levegő és Lélek. A Botok Hatos a Föld kupacban volt. Tehát az életemnek ezen a részén, a materiális, fizikai valóságban van dolgom ezzel a kártyával.

 

De mi lehet ez az üzenet? Lehet, hogy azt akarja mondani, hogy semmi diadalmas nincs abban, hogy hajnal fél hatkor blogolok? Lehetséges.

 

Megkérem, hogy írjon nekem egy levelet, ahogy az Over the Moon Orákulum Kártyáktól tanultam: (Ez egy hat lapos terítés – Kati)

 

Kedves Kérdező!

 

Amikor felbukkanok egy vetésben, ERRŐL (első lap) akarok neked üzenni. Megmutatom, hogy EZ (második lap) történik éppen, és azt szeretném, hogy ILYEN legyél, vagy ÍGY érezz (harmadik lap). Amikor megjelenek, arra kérlek, ereszd el EZT (negyedik lap), és fogadd el EZT (ötödik lap). Amikor meglátsz, ideje EZT (hatodik lap) tenned.

 

Üdvözlettel,

 

Tarot Zaklatód

 

Morgan Greer Tarot
Carla vetése a kérdésre. A lapok a Morgan Greer Tarot-ból vannak.
A levél:

 

Kedves Carla!

 

Amikor felbukkanok egy vetésben, arról akarok neked üzenni, hogyan zárnak börtönbe a  saját gondolataid. Megmutatom, hogy mennyire a negative dolgokra koncentrálsz. Olyan komoran állsz hozzá a dolgokhoz! Azt szeretném, hogy vidámabb, optimistább legyél – fedezd fel fizikai létedet és a fizikai világot! Állj a világhoz úgy, mint egy felfedező! Menj vissza az alapokhoz. Játssz a sárban, vagy csináld ennek a felnőtt változatát. Mi lett azokkal a felnőtt szinezőkkel, amiket vettél?

 

Amikor megjelenek, arra kérlek, engedd el a vágyat, hogy mindent te irányíts. Hagyd, hogy megtörténjenek a dolgok, és élvezz egy kis szünetet a kavargó gondolataid helyett. Pihenj! Amikor meglátsz, ideje, hogy gyorsan cselekedj – távolodj el a gondolataidtól, és élvezz egy kis ön-kényeztetést. Ha követed a tanácsomat, sokkal győzedelmesebben érzed majd magad a bőrödben.

 

Üdvözlettel,

 

Botok Hatos

 

Ennek örömére, visszmegyek aludni.

 

Csőcső!”

 

 

 

Reading with my Darth Vader Spread

In my last post I have shared a spread based on Star Wars’ Darth Vader. The result I got from the cards when reading with it was a little more than surprising, so I have decided to dedicate a whole post to it. After all, it is not an everyday occurrence that you get 3 Majors, a Court and an Ace in a five cards spread! So, this is what I made of it:

The Darth Vader Spread

  1. What is my gift? – Death
  2. In what way may I misuse my gift? – Justice
  3. What may compel me to do so? – The Tower
  4. How can I resist this temptation of misusing my gift?  – Queen of Pentacles
  5. What is my trade mark that everyone knows me by? – Ace of Pentacles

 

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If you squint in the right way, you can discover Darth Vader’s helm in the layout!😀

1. What is my gift? – Death

For those who know me it is not a surprise that I have got Death as my gift. My fascination with Death and the Beyond has never been a secret. A short anecdote if you allow me: in secondary grammar school on arts class, we were analyzing famous paintings.  I have commented on one that I didn’t really like it, to what my teacher said: “Well why would you, there isn’t a single corpse on it!

So what is my gift?

There are numerous things coming to mind. It is the ability of seeing Death as a part of our mortal lives. The ability of letting go. The ability to help others accept and let go. The ability to change, to transform myself and maybe others as well (this is in the future after loads of training). I can see myself working as a bereavement counselor in future. I believe there are no evil persons on the planet and that with education and acceptance people can change – of course it depends on their will to change and their surroundings, I am not that naive. I see everyone as equal and am very dependable – like Death. These are the mundane things that are not really the major aspects of the card.

Apart from these, there are some more serious things. I can communicate with the Other Side, go there if I want to. I have a very close relationship with some of the entities that live Beyond (not angels, that’s not my stuff). I can remember things from past lives and am currently training to take people back to theirs.

2. In what way may I misuse my gift? – Justice

I may misuse it if I won’t do it justice. It is clearly something I have to utilize in this life, taking that it is a Major Arcana card. I have to figure out in what way I can use my gift, and do it. I do feel the calling, but right now I am not ready yet. Too much earthly business is going on.🙂

3. What may compel me to do so? – The Tower

There could be a great break in my life when I lose the ability or the interest in these deathly things. My life line on my palm shows the same, and I feel I will have a Tower moment later in my life which will be very difficult to survive. I am not looking forward to it, to be honest, but will try and live through it with dignity.

The other thing that may stop me from using this gift is the fear of losing my personal life, if it makes sense. I am terrified of being judged by the ones I love. I fear they will see me as a lunatic, or tell me that Death and the dark side of one’s soul is not something a proper Indian wife should be making herself busy with – the color pink and the household would be more like it, seasoned with some soap watching in telly (strictly no Game of Thrones),  lol. But I am not a pink bubbly girl. I like dark colors and I need my calm, alone time.

4. How can I resist this temptation of misusing my gift?  – Queen of Pentacles

By being myself, hahaha! My significator is the sexy, magical, nurturing Queen of Pentacles. I have to present these things as completely natural, and show people that it is still me and haven’t changed just because I have returned to my “dark side”.

5. What is my trade mark that everyone knows me by? – Ace of Pentacles

 

Pentacles stand for nature, health, and magic. I am all of these: I love nature, and am trying my best at keeping it clean for generations after us. I love natural health remedies and am generally in a good health. And magic… I am the witch of the family, hahaha!😀

May the Fourth be with you! The Darth Vader Tarot Spread

vaderGreetings to all Star Wars fans on the most important day of the year!

For those who still don’t get it: you know in the Star Wars movies instead of saying good luck, they say ‘May the Force be with you’. Today is the 4th of May ~ May the fourth be with you? Theeeere you go!😀

So I have made this spread to honor the occasion. May I proudly present you:

 

The Darth Vader Spread


1. What is my gift? – Darth Vader was extraordinarily gifted, the Force was extremely strong in him. What is your gift that makes you extraordinary?
2. In what way may I misuse my gift? – Vader chose the Dark Side, and used his power for evil. We may not be in such an extreme situation, but there are ways we can misuse our talents too! Wasting it, for one.
3. What may compel me to do so? – Vader was lost in impatience, anger, and desire for power and love. The Jedi couldn’t give him what he wanted, so he slowly drifted towards the Dark Side. Moreover, his life was saved by the Dark Lord, so he was bound to him ever after.
4. How can I resist this temptation of misusing my gift? – Vader has at the end returned to the… Light Side to save his son. What is the thing that can stop you from choosing the Dark Side, aka the easy way?

5. What is my trade mark that everyone knows me by? – Vader has his breathing, his helm and his theme music. What do you have that others can recognize you instantly by?

 

The spread is arranged like Vader’s helm. If you squint in the right way. Aaaanyway, here are my cards:

  1. What is my gift? – Death
  2. In what way may I misuse my gift? – Justice
  3. What may compel me to do so? – The Tower
  4. How can I resist this temptation of misusing my gift?  – Queen of Pentacles
  5. What is my trade mark that everyone knows me by? – Ace of Pentacles

 

Wow, receiving Death as one’s talent is quite an honor! I will have to think this through before commenting on any of my cards, this is a seriously amazing result! D:

2016 Beltane Tarot Blog Hop

majusfa
May-tree (Májusfa) erected in Sóstó, Hungary

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As we know, Beltane marks the beginning of the second half of the Celtic year, opposite to Shamhain. Just like at Shamhain the Veil is thinner, but instead of the other world coming to ours, this time we can travel to the other world.

 

Our wrangler Karen Sealey asked us to write something about how we use the word “may” in our readings; what does it mean to us, do we use it often; write a poem about it, paint, photograph, dance about it. Kick it about and see what you get.

 

I have to admit, I had no idea what to write. I have taken up so many things that I’m about to drown myself, and I am not ready to think of puns in a language not native on my tongue (Yes I’m Hungarian, and yes, Viktor of House Orbán, First of his name, Defender of our Borders and Inflation and National Football, the Unbothered, Father of children who stand on their own feet, the Builder of Stadiums, is our prime minister but believe me no one likes him any more than you do. And yes I read Game of Thrones.). So I had to look for inspiration somewhere. I could have compared Hungarian traditions with Celtic ones that are done in May, but I was not feeling up to the challenge… Instead, what I found is The Beltane Crossing Over Spread by Sasha Graham from her book ‘365 Tarot Spreads – Revealing the magic in every day’. That is what I’m going to try here, because it has some crazy positions – like “What does it smell like in the netherworld?” I mean… that’s not a question I’d ask my cards…😀 Anyway, here it goes.

 

‘Beltane Crossing Over Spread’ by Sasha Graham

  1. What does the netherworld feel like? – The Veiled Lamp (Hermit)
  2. What does it smell like? – The Thunder-struck Tower (Tower)
  3. Whom do I encounter? – The Scepter (Ace of Wands)
  4. Are spirits happy there? – The Two Ways (Lovers)
  5. What does it feel like to be dead? – The Four Swords
  6. How is time experienced? – The Two Urns (Temperance)
  7. Do you watch me? – The Mistress of the Pentacle
  8. Do you make yourself known in our world? – The Warrior of the Pentacle
  9. What is the point of Life? – The seven Scepters
  10. What is the point of Death? – The three of Swords
  11. What lesson should I carry back to the regular world? – The Chariot of Osiris (Chariot)

 

FullSizeRender(8)
Deck used is The Egyptian Tarot by Comte Saint Germain, US Games.
1. What does the netherworld feel like? – The Veiled Lamp (Hermit)

It is lonely. You have left people you loved behind. At the same time, you know your time was up, and moving on isn’t that hard once you have actually crossed over. You can see the Light, and the Light is warm and beautiful.

 

2. What does it smell like? – The Thunder-struck Tower (Tower)

It smells of ashes and the faint smell of electricity.

 

3. Whom do I encounter? – The Scepter (Ace of Wands)

People who have left before me. My ancestors. My grandfather.

 

4. Are spirits happy there? – The Two Ways (Lovers)

Yes, they are surrounded by Love and their loved ones. But you have to choose to be happy and accept the Love, otherwise you will be yearning for your Life, that cannot be yours anymore.

 

5. What does it feel like to be dead? – The Four Swords

Restive. Like a spa break before returning. Sounds great!🙂 Although in the deck I am using, this card means regrets and feeling guilty. It depends on the person I guess.

 

6. How is time experienced? – The Two Urns (Temperance)

It flows by but you never notice it. There is no rush, everyone understands that when the time comes we will be together again. Until then you live in Love, so there is absolutely no hurry.

 

7. Do you watch me? – The Mistress of the Pentacle

(I don’t want anyone to watch me! That’s spooky!) Yes, they are watching and helping whenever they can.

 

8. Do you make yourself known in our world? – The Warrior of the Pentacle

If they can find the right vehicle/medium, they do make themselves known here. Otherwise we just go by, never noticing.

 

9. What is the point of Life? – The seven Scepters

To stand up for yourself, don’t let others pull you down and do what you love.  Defend your happiness and don’t listen to anyone who says it cannot be done.

 

10. What is the point of Death? – The three of Swords

To end what was not useful anymore. To let go of things you have been attached to. To break your and your loved ones’ hearts.

 

11. What lesson should I carry back to the regular world? – The Chariot of Osiris (Chariot)

Tell them there is life after Death. There is life after Afterlife. But these are not the things they should be worrying about. There is life before Death, and they could make it so much more blissful, joyful, adventurous, exciting, exalting, laughing, crying, playing, toiling, creating, destroying, controlling and letting go… They could live now, enjoy the small wonders and wonder over miracles. Take the reins and snap the behinds of your horses!

 

 

This wasn’t such a silly spread after all…

 

Oh, back to the original topic: I don’t use “may” in my readings much. Partly because I read in Hungarian, partly because I feel it makes the reading seem uncertain. Which of course it may be. Happy Beltane everyone!😉

 

 

 

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